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May 21 2018

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captainsnoop:

junioroctopus:

captainsnoop:

moyoka:

captainsnoop:

i’m going to start making shitty formulaic tumblr posts. someone respond to this incredulously so i can threaten them. 

what the fuck

i am going to turn you inside out 

op do you take constructive criticism

the only thing i take is lives 

roses are red, cucumbers are green

dirtycarsconfessions:

chickthiccs:

pencephobic:

image

No it did not my boy lightning not a ho

if u honestly believe that lightning mcqueen is not a fucking thot we got beef

daphnetrodon:

reblog if

just wanna see how many other people

cobaltdays:

Confirmed gay: *has a guy friend*

Everyone: y’all rawing or???

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c-sushi:

totally did not stay up till 4am drawing this despite all my urgent deadlines what are you talking about 

astronomifier:

realanimeboy:

what if people wrote author notes in essays like people do in fanfics

A/N: omg here comes the thesis statement!! >_<

A/N: almost at the minimum word requirement this was soooo hard

professor: shut up and write idiot -__-

me: eep o_o!!

Op im proud to annouce that im legally allowed to kill you now

anxietydaddy:

*me at Walmart* excuse me what isle is your serotonin on?

estelles:

i feel a lil upset rn but that’s what happens when ur alive i guess

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peterismymans:

honestly, me too

May 20 2018

duskdragonxiii:

Me whenever im sick: save me osmosis jones you sexy little microscopic blue bitch

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tandembicycles:

bunjywunjy:

“Hey, wanna see a Pixie Frog?” I ask

“Sure,” you say, holding out your hands

I plop this into your arms.

image

“hold him like a baby, he’s heavy” I instruct you

“what,” you mutter “the fuck.”

congratulations, you have  been forcibly introduced to the African Bullfrog, also 

known in pet-owner circles as the Pixie Frog.

image

look at his little hands!

while they are indeed adorable, the nickname actually derives from the scientific name of the species (pyxicephalus adspersus), and not any positive qualities they possess. 

image

hoo boy they don’t have many of those, lemme tell you

found throughout much of sub-Saharan Africa, the Pixie Frog lives in wet areas where they eat pretty much anything they can fit into those ginormous mouths. (this includes fish, other frogs, bugs, snakes, lizards, other frogs, rodents, unattentive birds, other frogs, and probably you too if you hold still long enough)

this is a creature born with neither fear nor conscience

and it’s no idle threat either, because Pixie Frogs can grow to 10 inches long, which is well within ‘unreasonably huge’ for an amphibian. also, unlike most frogs, Pixie Frogs have fucking teeth

ALL THE BETTER TO EAT YOU WITH, MY DEARRRRR

in spite of all of this, Pixie Frogs remain popular pet animals, possibly because they will allow you to pick them up and carry them around like a newborn.

and we can respect that.

she has four of them and they’re named after her grandchildren

just, you know, make sure you count your fingers after you hold one.

@dustail

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tinysaurus-rex:

earth-tooth:

dont support industries that are driving animals to extinction thank you!

Already reblogged one of these but another reminder: don’t by nautilus shells!

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thepurpleglass:

followingponies:

prikle:

ssjgssjgoku:

everets:

this is so sad… look what evolution has done. why? why did horses have to get big

They are still growing

the first horse…….. was human

@paradise-estate :

There you go!

A perfect time to bring this back:

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thyrell:

xxxtictacion:

Hey uh op…. where’s your url…

there’s no url because god sent this post down to us

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skysworn:

baawri:

Britney Spears on Sabrina the Teenage Witch

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kissmeagainarthas:

the-flightoficarus:

sherlockvowsontheriverstyx:

fashionhasnogender:

thorvalkyrie:

Chris Hemsworth’s Vanity Fair Cover Shoot

#the female gaze

this is the female fucking gaze

Whoever shot this, keep hiring them

What Women Want (2017), dir: Taika Waititi

skeletoncrimes:

me criticizing fantasy settings in 2007: lmao none of this geography makes sense. and look at these names. this one has four apostrophes in it

me criticizing fantasy settings in 2017:  has no one…has no one considered the matter of fishing rights

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